On April 9th, Washington Nationals bearded outfielder Jayson Werth reached and passed the 500-RBI mark, driving in three runs in the Nationals’ 8-7 victory over the White Sox. His two-run homer in the sixth inning shot straight into Section 105…right where I was sitting.
Luckily, I scrambled out of the way like a real man, while the gentleman in front of me, shielding his wife (but really just trying to catch the ball), tried to grasp it as the ball bounced off the ground and right into his body. A lucky bystander was able to snatch it off the ground while hoisting in high in the air to indicate to challenging alpha males he was king of the area (he’s the guy making the derp face in the below picture; yours truly in the red cap).
Ah, the triumphant moment when your manhood is proven by
catching stealing picking up a home-run ball. But wait, this was not just any home-run, this Jayson Werth’s 500-RBI home-run…and he wanted his ball back!
Shortly after confirming the brave gentleman – who undoubtedly is telling his friends how he snatched the ball from the heavens, and indeed directly out of the godly grip of Zeus himself – was not injured, an attendant came over and said Jayson wanted the ball. Now, if this young lad had tossed the ball to a nearby younger baseball fan like a proper gentleman, all would be right with the world. Alas to the victor goes the spoils…or something like that.
He said he was promised something after the game. A sweat towel perhaps? Maybe a worn sock?
All kidding aside, congratulations to Jayson Werth (I would have wanted the ball back too), and congrats to the Washington Nationals on a great start to the 2013 season!
Oh, and when you’re at the ballpark, unless the ball you caught is likely to fetch $500 on eBay immediately, do the right thing and make some kid’s day by tossing them the ball.