15 Reasons You Should Never Visit Old Town Alexandria

15 Reasons You Should Never Visit Old Town Alexandria

Ugh, don’t you just hate beautiful scenery, awesome food, and historic AF pubs. Us too.

For some reason Old Town Alexandria was ranked one of the best downtowns in America.

Source: Craig Hudson / Flickr

People seem be under the impression that Old Town it’s charming, but it is oh so drab.

Source: virginia.org

For starters, the waterfront is hideous.

The architecture is nothing special.

Much to your chagrin, you will find many unimpressive firework displays.

Source: blog.visitalexandriava.com

The holidays are, you get the idea, depressing here.

Source: blog.visitalexandriava.com

Alexandria is practically a ghost town on St. Patrick’s Day.

Source: Alexandria Times

The whole town is stuck in the past.

Dogs rate Old Town Alexandria with a unanimous “two paws down.”

The speakeasies are difficult to find & the cocktails are hardly picture worthy.

Captain Gregory’s

Trust me, the Farmers Market is nothing to write home about.

Source: oldtownhome.com / Alexandria’s farmers market is one of the oldest in America & where George Washington used to sell his produce

Whats more, the Torpedo Factory doesn’t make actual torpedoes anymore. Lame.

Source: blog.visitalexandriava.com / The Torpedo Factory Art Gallery http://torpedofactory.org

There are a ludicrous amount of ice cream shops in a one block radius.

And you guessed it, the food scene is mediocre AF

Source: Brabo Tasting Room

And the bike trails are the worst.

Source: blog.visitalexandriava.com

Don’t say I didn’t warn you.

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